


and it hurts like hell

by softjace (hhwgv)



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: F/F, Murder, Pre-Fic character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-03
Updated: 2016-08-03
Packaged: 2018-07-29 03:39:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7668685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hhwgv/pseuds/softjace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chills run down Clary’s spine when the police officer says the four words she didn’t want to here. “<i>We found her body.</i>”</p>
            </blockquote>





	and it hurts like hell

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the _death/loss_ square on my [tmifemslash bingo](clarymaureen.tumblr.com/tagged/tmifemslashbingo) card.
> 
> Title is from the song _Hurts Like Hell_ by Fleurie.

Chills run down Clary’s spine when the police officer says the four words she didn’t want to here. “ _We found her body._ ” She wants to scream as tears well in her eyes. _No. No, no, no_. She thinks, ‘ _This is not how it’s supposed to end._ ’ Clary can hear Alec trying to steady his breathing beside her and Jace is standing next to him – his face blank, shocked. Robert is trying to comfort Maryse, he holds her as sobs wrack her body and tries to blink back the tears in his own eyes.

Isabelle had disappeared three weeks ago – she was there one moment and missing the next – and, despite the sick knot that had formed in her stomach, Clary kept trying to convince herself that Isabelle would be okay, that they’d find her alive and well. Clary told herself it was wedding stress, that Isabelle had just needed a break from the intense pressure of wedding planning. She’d spent the past three weeks hoping that Izzy would come back and they’d talk – maybe they’d downsize their wedding.

As the news sinks in, Clary can practically feel her heart being torn in two. The dam behind her eyes gives way and the tears pour down her face. Her knees buckle and she falls to the floor in a heap – her future is gone, every single one of her dreams had been shattered. Izzy was the cornerstone of all of Clary’s plans. They were supposed to get married, Clary was supposed to open her own art studio, Izzy was supposed to continue her rise in popularity, they were supposed to get their happily ever after.

“How did she die?” Alec is the first to say anything other than a murmured, “ _no._ ”

“We’re not quite sure yet,” is the officer’s response, polite and emotionless, “but we are treating the investigation as a homicide.”

Clary looks up from where she’s sitting on the floor. “Do you have any suspects?” she asks, unable to keep the pain out of her voice.

”We have a few leads,” the officer nods. He says something else, but Clary can’t hear anything over the deafening sound of her heart pounding in her ears. She feels herself disintegrating again, the wave of anger morphing back into despair.

She doesn’t keep track of the days as they pass anymore – one by one they merge together until it’s nothing but a dull nothingness. Clary can’t bear to be in the apartment that she and Izzy used to share, everything she looks at hurts, so Simon, Jace, and Maureen let her sleep on their couch. Sometimes she wakes up with a start – her brain piecing together nightmares of what happened to Isabelle.

Clary can barely go outside without seeing a picture of Isabelle somewhere – whether it’s on a newspaper, tv, or even just one of the old _Missing_ posters that haven’t been taken down. There were times when seeing Isabelle’s face made it feel like she couldn’t breathe, like her lungs were suddenly filled with lead. She spent every day waiting, hoping, and praying that they’d figure out who did it, that they’d catch the guy and the nightmare would finally be over.

But the truth was that the nightmare would never be over. As long as Isabelle was gone, every day would be a nightmare.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment/kudos if you enjoyed!


End file.
